I’ve come to the realization that our life is a cross between Seinfeld’s bizarro world and Mystery Science Theater*. Where the majority of our friends are becoming empty nesters, planning their flights of freedom, we are firmly planted on the ground with a third wheel. Just as we were seeing glorious independence, Jessie crashed, forcing us to be grounded.
Little bird didn’t break a wing, but she might as well have. Jess has been having sleep issues since the beginning of the year. Actually, she doesn’t have trouble sleeping, she just doesn’t want to be in her room alone. It’s a mystery as to why now would Jess suddenly need her mom? Anxiety, constipation, seizures or effects from a full moon?
When Jess was a baby, she comforted herself and went to sleep without a hitch. Now the only person that gives her comfort is me and that is turning me into a sleep disturbed mom. I’d use stronger language, but am not in the mood to rhyme.
The other night, as I headed for bed, I found Jess sitting in an arm chair, in the dining room. She jumped up and gave me the look. Full of anxiousness. She placed her hands on my shoulders, looked me in the eye and reached up to remove my glasses. During the day, she insists that I wear them, but when they come off, it’s a sign that it’s time to turn in.
I know this look. I’ve seen it these last few weeks. I walked her to her room. She gets under the covers and settles in, but as soon as I turn to leave, she scrambles out of bed, bolting for the door.
Out of desperation, I’ve resorted to telling her to move over. She’d then flash me a loving, peaceful smile. When the snoring begins, I tiptoe out. The rhyme “step on a crack, break your mother’s back” comes to mind. Jess wakes up and we have to start the process all over again..Damn you squeaky floor boards! (Husband, I’m adding this to your honey-do-list).
Eventually, I make it to my room. Husband is snoring, everyone is asleep but me. A few hours later, around 2:30am, Jess takes herself to the bathroom. She then looks for me. Imagine that I’m in my own bed… she insists I return to her room and I’ve complied. All I want to do is sleep. All she wants is to be comforted. This system has worked for awhile, but it was only meant to be a temporary stop gap solution.
While in the midst of this non-sleeping-mystery, we decided to try Charolette’s web. We had nothing to lose. I sought out info from mother’s that I know who’ve had success. (for seizures, as well as processing issues). Jess had a drop in the morning (which made her sleepy) and a drop before bed time.
The first few days, we didn’t notice a change, but on the fourth, Jess had her best day ever! She connected all the dots without hesitation. There were no processing delays and she was an eager, willing participant. It was remarkable! Unfortunately, it lasted only a day. Slowly her attitude deteriorated. Even worse, for the first time, Jess stopped using her Talker. It became obvious that this was not going to perform any miracles for us. There wasn’t suppose to be any residual effect, but It took her a few days to return to her center.
It’s been a week since she had the CBD oil. Last night was the first night Jess slept in her room alone. This didn’t happen without a lot of drama. Even when she took herself to the bathroom and insisted I return to her room with her, I stood my ground. Enough is enough. I’m sure she will try to wear me down again, but I have to break the pattern. I predict the next few nights are going to get worse before they get better. Jess is very hard headed and stubborn, but so am I.
Some day, I’m sure she will tell me what caused this, but for now, it will remain a mystery. All I can say is that this game show host is not going to break, she’s just tired.
*Forced by evil scientists to watch bad “B” movies until he breaks, a host (Joel in the early years, Mike later in the show’s run) and a bunch of captive robots comment on the films in order to keep sane.